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me_irlgbt survey results! really long post! this took me 6 days! exclamation mark!

Long post. REALLY long post. buckle in.

TLDR at the end

First off, thanks to everybody who responded! There were 467 responses in total, which is amazing. I know filling out surveys online can be boring, so I really appreciate you all indulging me for this.
A few notes before we get started!
  • The aim of this research was to get a better picture of the people who involve themselves in this shitposty mess. Nothing was too strenuous, and as this was basically just research for funsies, it’s obviously not fully academic. I did try to follow general good practices, but I’ve also fucked about a little. This isn’t going in a fancy journal.
  • I have presented the data with the finest graphs Google Sheets has to offer. I am not an expert in using spreadsheets, so some of it may be, in academic terms, somewhat fucky.
  • I am not an especially adept researcher or statistician. I’m studying this shit in college but that doesn’t mean I’m good at it yet. I know we get some researchers round these parts, and I’d thank you to not cringe too hard at my work.
Now. Let's get started with the results.

Total survey responses: 467

DEMOGRAPHICS SECTION

AGE: 460 responses

https://imgur.com/thGOvqi
As we can see here, the majority of respondents are between the ages of 13-24, with most being 18-24. No surprise, this pretty much tracks with the general demographics of reddit. We have 3 tiny kiddos who responded, bless them. One person over 60, heyhowareyougorge. It’s interesting to cross-reference the age demographics with the type of posts we see here. I’m in my early 20s, which in gay years is like being in your early 40s, and i’ve been out for years. I see a lot of closet or coming out type posts, which I personally don’t relate to as much any more, but that totally tracks with the amount of youngins we have here. If you’re looking to karma whore, here’s the data you need.

COUNTRY: 457 responses

https://imgur.com/xwAb3g8
So, clearly very US-heavy. Again, not a surprise here for a US-based website. I would like to confess to purposefully splitting up the UK demographics out of sheer curiosity too; I’m Scottish and wanted to know how many fellow Scots I had. Happenin troops.
I also wanted to use this to see how many people were from countries with less legal protections for being LGBT. The countries in here I’d particularly like to highlight are:
Dominica, where it is illegal to be gay. Penalties include a 10 year prison sentence, or “incarceration in a psychiatric institution.” Absolutely no legal protections for any LGBT people. That’s pretty fucked.
India has no legally recognised same sex unions, no same sex marriage, no adoption, but all of these things have been proposed. some anti-discrimination laws. They have a third gender option, called hijra. Trans people do have some legal recognition of gender, which is nice. As far as I’m aware, this situation is pretty unique to India.
Qatar, where same-sex sexual activity is punished by fines, imprisonment, or the death penalty. Obviously no legal protections.
Russia, where same-sex sexual activity is technically legal, but in Chechnya, it is heavily punished. Gay people are abducted and sent to concentration camps in this region. Russia has done little to prevent this.
Singapore, where there is technically punishment of up to 2 years in prison for male same-sex sexual activity, but this is apparently not enforced any more. F/F is legal though.
Malaysia, where it remains illegal to be gay. Punishments can be up to 20 years in prison, fines, or whippings, just for engaging in same-sex sexual activity. However, a 2016 court ruling did recognise gender changes as a fundamental constitutional right, according to wikipedia.
I’d like us to take a moment to remember, especially if you’re from the US, that the fight for LGBT rights is far from over. It’s not some distant thing. Even people on this good gay subreddit could face severe punishments for their identity. If you are in a country with legal protections, take a moment to be thankful. If you can, please educate yourself on the state of LGBT rights in these countries, and see if you can do anything to help.

ETHNICITY: 463 responses

https://imgur.com/hk6KINj
Again, not particularly surprising results here. Reddit is a pretty overwhelmingly white website. I’m a full blown white person so I’m not sure how much I can really say here without verging out of my own lane. I do think we should keep this in mind however, because as a largely white subreddit we may not have so many people calling out racism when they see it. I don’t want POC to feel ignored here just because they make up a smaller percentage of our demographics, so I welcome any POC responses here as to how we’re doing with that. I personally haven’t seen too much racism, as the bigotry we tend to get is centred around our lgbt identities. Whenever I see it it tends to be anti-black, and usually confined to usernames. I do try to ban that whenever I see it, but I’m only one person, so I do rely on you to report things to me!

GENDER: 467 responses

https://imgur.com/GOMLltE
https://imgur.com/BY9eRfU
Now, this is the one I’ve had to go in and fuck with. This, and all the other charts, are basically just the raw data in visual form. The chart above is each individual response, allowing for those who selected multiple options. So, rather than counting every time someone selected “male”, then “nonbinary”, etc, it’s counting every time a person selected “male + cisgender,” “nonbinary + queer”, if that makes sense.
This chart here is the one I’ve fucked with, that just has the amount of times an option was selected.
https://imgur.com/ejdAKm9
I basically simplified the data here. Whenever someone said something like unsure, unknown, etc, this was put under “questioning”. The “other” responses are the only ones that received significant editing. These were long-form responses that could not be parsed into simple answers, so here they are in their entirety.
  • “Something like that lol”
  • “I don’t have one of these ‘gender identities’ everyone keeps talking about”
  • “Lol i’m absolutely fucked and i have no idea”
  • “What is this ‘gender’ you speak of”
  • “My sex is female”
Now, I could probably have parsed them into other categories, but honestly I thought this was more entertaining.
Some important things to remember when reading this data! * I collected it pretty poorly. I wasn’t aware of how google would collate it and i done goofed a bit. Take it with a pinch of salt. * once i “simplified” the data to look at how many times each option was selected, I ended up with almost 800 pieces of data. You’ll recall that only 467 people responded to the survey, so there is significant overlap. This is why I'm showing you two versions. The crossover is not fully clear, and there’s probably ways I could process this data better, but i’m gonna be real with y'all it’s a lot to wade through and I'm honestly just bad at this * This question allowed people to choose as many or as few labels as they wanted. Some people listed their gender as just “transgender” with no other qualifiers, for example. Therefore this data should be treated as only a partial picture of the gender demographics of this subreddit

PRONOUNS: 464 responses

https://imgur.com/lsP8661
Again, I arguably messed up on the collection of results here, BUT, I do think it’s very interesting to see the combinations of pronouns people use. For example, I think it’s cool to see that, among those who use they/them pronouns
  • 25 respondents use they/them as their only pronouns
  • 31 use he/him and they/them
  • 30 use she/her and they/them
Now obviously it’s gonna be difficult to argue for these results to be generalised to the population at large, but this does support what I’ve seen anecdotally for a while; neutral pronouns are often used alongside non-neutral pronouns. We might not have seen this if I had been a better researcher.
Here is the version with my own editing, simplification, and parsing of “other” results:
https://imgur.com/6sR4w3U
Other results are as follows, presented without comment
  • ”A variety of neopronouns”
  • ”Whatever is right in the moment”
  • ”in the closet for everyone except online friends”
  • ”any pronouns”
  • ”well i would use those pronouns if i was out or if anyone respected them lmao help me”
  • ”any/all”
  • ”the normal ones”
  • ”All? IDK it’s been a very confusing time”
  • ”he/him among general public, they/them among close friends but out in public, would like to use she/her but only when out and fully transitioned”
  • ”I don't know what this means”
Among neopronoun usage, we have specific examples of: * ve/ver * it/its
If we put this alongside the “other” responses that indicate neopronoun usage, we can say that 5 of our respondents use, or are comfortable using, neopronouns.
I think this is an interesting point to highlight, because common transphobe rhetoric is that people are using a “confusing” variety of pronouns. We have a generally trans-friendly sub (at least I hope so), and out of 464 respondents to this question, only 5 people indicated neopronoun usage. Could it be that this line of thinking, that people are using confusing newfangled pronouns, is just an uninformed scream from the ignorant?

SEXUALITY: 467 responses

https://imgur.com/CXVxEKc
Again, raw data. For this one I don’t feel it’s super necessary to go in and parse out who picked multiple things, because the data here seems kinda straightforward, if you’ll pardon the pun.
We have a lot of bi and pan people here. Again, it’s difficult to argue for the generalisation of these results, but this does support evidence of bisexual people making up the majority of the LGBT community. If we compare this to the by now well known findings from the Kinsey institute, this does support the belief that most people are likely neither a Kinsey 1 or a Kinsey 6, but somewhere in the middle. It’s not directly comparable because I didn’t use the same metrics, but it’s interesting to think about.
I also think it’s interesting to see so many straight respondents. Of course, this could just be trans people who are straight, but I know from the comments I’ve received that some people who responded are totally non-LGBT, just allies.
Also, shoutouts to “an absolute mess” and “just desperate for love”. Same, babes.

EDUCATION: 461 responses

There were enough “other” responses that I felt like I needed to go in and take those out, so here’s the raw data before I did that.
https://imgur.com/eguYGeK
And here is the simplified version
https://imgur.com/DZClNVV
Here are the “Other” responses
  • have not completed high forms of education
  • IDK not american
  • still studying
  • middle school (x4)
  • wasn't allowed to go to school by parents, currently studying for high school entrance exam
  • TAFE Diploma
  • 2nd year degree
  • gray
  • in 5th year of phd but no master's earned on the way
  • professional degree (Juris Doctor)
  • certificate of achievement, 1yr college
  • What’s a diploma
My favourite response is “IDK not american”. As we all know, education only exists in America.
Anyway, this pretty much tracks along the age demographics. With a population mostly aged between 13-24, it makes sense that the majority are high school or college educated.
Of course, it should be kept in mind that not everybody’s education is a linear or traditional experience, and won’t completely track with our age demographics.
Shoutouts to the 3-4 people with PhDs tho, mad respect.
And that wraps up our demographics section! Onto some of the cool shit.

PERSONAL LIFE SECTION

POLITICAL ALIGNMENT: 477/467

https://imgur.com/TUQNBVJ
Here’s the raw data. As you can see, there’s a lot of write-in responses. If you’ve spent any time hanging out on this subreddit, I don’t think it’s any shock to see how overwhelmingly left-leaning we are. I think this sort of goes with the territory of being an LGBT subreddit though, we do tend to develop liberal politics as an attempt to avoid homophobia and transphobia, and then from there it’s easy to fall into leftist politics, especially on places like Reddit.
Simplified data: https://imgur.com/isja5Kc
Other responses:
  • Don’t have these words in AUS
  • I have a hard time understanding all the different words, but I know I’m the opposite of Donald Trump
  • LibCenter
  • anarcho-communist
  • social libertarian
  • Hard to say since these terms mean slightly different things in different places/political climates
  • Whoever isn't a racist bigot
  • slutty sjw whos ready to bust a fat nut and shoot capitalists
  • angry *Governmental axis: libertarian. Economic axis: centrist. Social axis: progressive
  • I don't have a strict political alignment, I just think that every politician can have good ideas whatever their alignment is
  • I vote based on the current goals of each party
  • regulated markets, welfare capitalism, taco trucks on every corner. thank you for coming to my ted talk.
  • Whatever is Civil Rights
  • leftish antiauthoritarian
  • no one changes anything but rich mens pocket books
  • Progressive
  • Green
  • Prefer not to say
  • Independent
We’re clearly a very left-leaning subreddit here. I think it’s interesting that out of a total of 447 responses, only 9 disclosed that they were on the right-hand side of the political spectrum. Is this because only 4% of people round these parts are on the right, or is due to an unwillingness to identify with conservative politics, even on an anonymous survey? Difficult to know for sure. Interesting data tho amirite.
Also whoever answered “slutty sjw whos ready to bust a fat nut”, same girl

RELIGION 460/467

Raw data: https://imgur.com/oQQWZH9
Again, a fuckfest here, but even before we go in and parse things out we can see that 336/460 indicate atheist or agnostic beliefs. This sort of goes along with my hypothesis/unscientific belief that a majority of LGBT people are non-religious, or will find religion themselves later on. I personally would love to do research on the prevalence of found religion in later life, especially pagan/wiccan type beliefs, in LGBT people. I think a lot of us do really desire that sort of connection to spirituality, but can’t always get it from the religions we were raised in. This is from my perspective as a western white person raised around christian/catholic beliefs; I know there’s differences with, for example, Judaism, where it’s fully baked into the culture to question and argue with your own beliefs, so I know there’s a hell of a lot of cultural bias going into this assumption.
Simplified data
https://imgur.com/FimSsoh
I’ve kept Atheist/agnostic as separate categories, grouped the different Satanism responses, and again created an “other” category.
Other responses:
  • Both Christian and agnostic
  • Dragons
  • exmormon
  • I don't believe in a conscious force making decisions, but there is some sort of force underlying the physical world
  • idk man. dudeism?
  • Its a mix
  • Meh
  • None (not explicitly atheist or agnostic, just...ehhhhh)
  • Unitarian Universalist
  • Science Christian
Given that this is Reddit, I’m not surprised by the high amount of atheist/agnostic responses, given that the site still has a strong legacy left behind by the glory days of /atheist. With this bias in mind, I do still think this presents a compelling basis for further research on the religious affiliations of LGBT people.

RELATIONSHIP STATUS 465/467

https://imgur.com/vcrZae3
This one actually didn’t require much fucking with, so I’ve just presented the gently simplified data.
Other responses
  • In a queer-platonic relationship
  • I walk a lonley road, the only one that i have ever known.
  • I’m not really sure rn
  • It’s complicated
  • In a polyamorous relationship
  • I have a domme
  • Polyamorous
  • On a crash course to divorce :(
Wow we’re a single lot aren’t we
Honestly I think this correlates with the age demographics. If I were a better data analyst I’d go in and confirm this with the data, but I’m not, so I won’t. Knowing that we have a lot of younger people, who are more likely to have either no relationship or a frequently changing/unstable relationship status, this kinda seems about right. It would be interesting though to compare this with relationship data from other LGBT communities. I think we all know the struggles of finding available partners, especially when you are, as the data suggests, in high school or college. It’d be interesting to see if the high rate of single people here is due to a desire to seek out other LGBT people in order to gain a sense of community as well. Maybe LGBT people in a relationship feel they already have enough of a sense of community and belonging and are therefore less likely to seek out LGBT spaces online. That’ll require some good qualitative data tho which is time consuming. Could be really cool tho.

THOUGHTS ON TERFS 463/467

Raw data: https://imgur.com/CQ2hSu4
This was a big question. There’s a lot of write-in responses here, so I’ll go through those.
Simplified data
https://imgur.com/YwNUYsR
Other results, presented without comment
  • accept everyone or get the fuck out
  • Confused
  • Fuck TERFs
  • Fuck TERFs
  • Fuck TERFs
  • Fuck TERFs
  • Fuck TERFs seriously
  • Fuck them with the rustiest rake you can find
  • Hate them
  • [Dislike] However, I do not condone jokes of violence against Terfs
  • I don't even know what that is.
  • I don't know or care what that means
  • I hate them so god damned much even the mention of the word terf makes me wanna punch a *wall then vomit.
  • I have never heard of this
  • I have no idea who they are
  • Idk bout them
  • liquidate them
  • Never heard of them
  • Not sure exactly what that means but if I understand it right I dislike them because I support transgender people
  • punch them
  • strongly dislike is not enough
  • [just a transphobic pro-terf comment]
  • strongly dislike isn't strong enough.
  • TERF is a slur lol
  • terfs r trash
  • They can go to hell
  • They have no place
  • Too little experience with them to form a meaningful opinion
  • we should set them on fire
  • trans rights babey
I think this is a pretty conclusive result. Of the 29 “other” responses, 20 of them indicate Dislike to Strongly Dislike. 5 respondents said Strongly Like, and 1 said Like. These respondents were the only ones who also put in positive “other” responses. 82% of responses were Strongly Dislike.
This is honestly going to inform my moderation style. I always remove outwardly transphobic comments, especially if they mirror the “rational people” comment in the responses above. However, seeing such a strong dislike of TERFs will likely mean I’ll remove more comments that are gently TERFy but not as explicit.
I do want to reiterate, this is a feminist space. I personally am a strong feminist. I hold some more radical feminist views. I also believe trans women are women, they have a place in the feminist movement, and in women’s spaces. You can absolutely be a trans INCLUSIVE radical feminist. Feminism is almost useless without intersectionality. Trans people are valid and welcomed here. Transphobia will never be tolerated here. Not up for debate.

THOUGHTS ON TRANSMEDICALISTS 460/467

Raw data:
https://imgur.com/rWZFUBp
Again, lots of write in responses. Same script as last time
Simplified data:
https://imgur.com/sQro5dq
Other results
  • At first glance, this notion makes sense to me, but I know to little about the issue to form a meaningful opinion
  • Dissagree w/ but not dislike as people
  • Don't know whether they're right or wrong since I'm not trans therefore can't confirm shit
  • Fuck truscum
  • Fuck truscum.
  • I can understand where they're coming from, but i think it's a harmful ideology all the same
  • I don't agree transition is necessary, since sometimes staying in the closet is the only way to survive. But dysphoria of some kind is necessary.
  • I don't understand how people can be trans if they've never experienced Dysphoria. Not being a dick, i just can't find an explaination.
  • I get where they're coming from
  • I have no opinion. If somebody says they're trans, all i want are their preferred pronouns.
  • I haven't heard about this before, I'd have to read up on it before giving an opinion!
  • I just need to shout about the exclusionary nature of the stance
  • I think dysphoria is necessary, but not medically transitioning
  • I’d err on the side of caution because it sounds like it could be ehhh. I don’t know enough about *the trans part of the LGBT+ community to properly answer this one
  • I’m not sure about them yet
  • It isnt nessacsry but many people do experience it
  • N/A
  • Neutral as long as they aren’t excessively pushy or rude about it.
  • New to this concept tbh
  • No opinion
  • Non-binary trans is still trans.
  • Not enough reading or research done on my part to have an informed opinion
  • Not familiar with this topic enough to say
  • punch them too
  • Therapists should treat it
  • There is background to their points but their attitude stunts progress for all trans people
  • they're very flammable too
  • trans people are trans regardless of what gender affirmations, if any, they choose to undergo. ❤️
  • trans rights babey
  • uncle terfs, more or less.
  • Unknown
  • wanting to be a different gender = gender dysphoria, so 90% of the time transmedicalism is just *pointless gatekeeping
This is the one I definitely needed trans people’s opinions on. I am cis-ish (androgynous butchy lesbian who occasionally likes a cheeky they/them pronoun but is for all intents and purposes a woman/dyke) and so feel entirely unqualified to weigh in and decide which side of the issue is “correct”.
  • 56.2% of responses indicate either Dislike or Strongly Dislike transmedicalists
  • Of the “other” responses, 15/29 indicate a dislike or disagreement with transmedicalist ideology
  • There is a large amount of “neutral” or “no opinion” responses. I can assume a lot of these are from cis people who, like me, feel unqualified to weigh in.
This is also likely to inform my moderation style somewhat. Again, I always remove blatant transphobia when I see it, and this includes anybody stating that nonbinary people are not valid, not real, etc. From these results, I’m going to assume this is the right move, and continue with this strategy.
I personally lean towards not believing in transmedicalism. Some of this may very well stem from my feminist views, but I generally think gender is extremely fluid, and that labels are only worth what the individual believes they represent. If any of you have an understanding of sociology, I tend towards a Weberian/symbolic interactionist approach towards labels in general. Therefore I believe whatever a person identifies as is probably the right identity for them, regardless of what I may think of it. This isn’t necessarily relevant to your understanding of the survey, but it may be relevant to your understanding of my moderation actions.
That wraps up this section! This was a long one, thanks for sticking with us <3

ME_IRLGBT OPINIONS

THOUGHTS ON THE SUBREDDIT 457/467

https://imgur.com/VUwfXtq
Finally, some data i don’t need to fuck around with. Note to self, do more ratings like this.
Obviously as a mod I’m happy to see that opinions trend above 5 here. The average score we’re getting here is 7.87 (2dp) and honestly, I’m down. If that was a movie on IMDB, that shit would be a pretty well-received movie. The most frequent response here is 8/10, and most responses are between 7-10, which tells me people generally enjoy hanging out here. I know there’s always a strong chance for bias here, because the people who are likely to respond to a kinda long survey for a subreddit are likely to be people who either really enjoy it, or really don’t. However, even with that bias, I’m gonna just take the W if that’s cool with you.

THOUGHTS ON MODERATION 445/467

https://imgur.com/pmkKyuC
Slightly lower trend than overall subreddit opinions, but the average is almost the same at 7.73 (2dp).
Since sending out this survey I have made some slight tweaks to my moderation style, as well as making some additions to the automoderator. We’ll chat about that later. I’m glad the overall trend here is positive though; I don’t want this to be a place where you all just end up resenting me.

DO WE NEED MORE MODS? 428/467

https://imgur.com/gwZuKtM
Other responses:
  • 🤷
  • don’t care
  • I don't know. I'm new to Reddit
  • i dont have a reddit account, and i very rarely check comments. I dont think i'm the best person to answer this.
  • I dont pay attention enough to say
  • I just discovered this subreddit like yesterday so I don't really know
  • I think we need mods who do more than just let people police the sub themselves. We may only need a new mod if the current mods don’t change how they mod. Respond to reports is what I’m saying (I don’t see almost any removed comments ever)
  • Idk
  • idk i just enjoy the memes
  • idk im just lurking here
  • Idk. How many moderators do you have?
  • if they're good moderators
  • maybe? i think a little more mod participation would be cool. just seeing admins in comments laughing and joking along with us, and sharing in the memes. i enjoy the hands-off approach but that doesn't mean i don't ever wanna see more mods chilling out and sorta like.,..... making their presence known and joining in on the fun!!! yknow it makes it feel safer
  • no idea tbh but it seems to be running ok
So the general answer here is that we maybe need more mods. Far more people said no than said yes.
Personal interpretation is that people may have felt more comfortable answering “maybe” than answering “yes”. I know that having one active mod for a 90k subreddit is not usual, and by now most subreddits will have gotten a couple more people in. I won’t speak for parlayv but, if you think i’m hands-off, she’s like, not even got hands. Hands not on this plane. We did create the subreddit together (IIRC I came up with the name and she was like “omg that needs to be a subreddit” and then, all of a sudden, it was) but I’m the one who pretty much runs it. I don’t think she’d take issue with me saying that. She’s too busy playing runescape and smoking weed anyway lmao
So, given the general results, I will look at bringing more mods on. I’ll probably pull from people I know first, and if that doesn’t work, may open up applications later. If this happens you’ll all know about it.
I’ll address some of the comments at the very end. Your concerns are not going unnoticed!

THOUGHTS ON RESEARCHERS 459/467

https://imgur.com/Px4XqGQ
Another very similar score, but this time the most frequent response by far is a 10. Average score is 7.84
This one was kinda important for me. I made the decision to allow researchers to post their surveys here. Full disclosure, when researchers come to me in modmail, my key concern is that they’ve followed all ethical procedures. So far, every single one has been done through a university in an official capacity, which means they have to prove they’ve gone through the ethics of their work and it’s been approved before they can even start researching. Whenever I’ve checked them out they seem completely fine, and I’ve so far not received any complaints, which makes me feel good.
I personally believe research is incredibly important for us to understand ourselves, as well as other people. I’m obviously biased as hell here because I’m a social sciences student but the whole reason I’m interested in this field is the benefits I believe it can bring to us. So if it’s cool with you all, I’m going to take this result as support for research posts. For now I don’t foresee any issues with frequency but we’ll revisit this if that becomes a problem. I’d like to give you all a sincere thank you for your positive reception to these posts <3

SHOULD WE BAN TERFS OR TRANSMEDICALISTS? 461/467

This question specified “regardless of rulebreaking”, meaning should they be banned on sight if they say they identify as either a TERF or a transmedicalist. I also meant if they posted in TERF or transmedicalist subreddits, but I didn’t specify this, so I won’t use that in my analysis of this data.
https://imgur.com/o1fevKC
Other responses
  • Allow them only if they don't say anything transphobic on me_irlgbt
  • ban 'em when they post inflammatory stuff to bait responses
  • allow transmeds to flair their posts/create separate sub
  • only ban Transmedicalists if they’re being dicks about it
  • don't know enough about transmedicalists to say
  • Ban transmedicalists, do not ban TERFs
  • Definitely ban TERFs, I just don't really know much about trans medicalists, so I feel weird making a definitive statement about them.
  • Definitely ban TERFs. I’m neutral on transmedicalists
  • Forum should not be allowed to become a hostile environment. They can easily do that.
  • I don't know the context behind transmedicalists but if they're anything like terfs then yes ban them
  • I think a distinction must be made between hate and ignorance. Obvious hate should naturally be answered with a ban, but rule-breaking content arising from possible ignorance should be met with a removal, private warning and, most importantly, directing the poster toward resources to educate themselves.
  • I think there is more ground to talk with transmedicalists but that I would prefer not to deal with them. TERFs should be banned regardless of circumstance.
  • I’m not sure how i feel about just “banning” people but i disagree with them both
  • if being mean
  • If making people uncomfortable
  • If they are strongly voicing there options, even in other sub, that may be harmful.
  • Keep them on a shorter leash
  • Maybe? Or at least make posting that stuff against the rules
  • No opinion
  • Only ban when breaking rules, but dismissing trans women & gnc/nb trans peeps should be against the rules
  • Only if they are putting forth their beliefs in a way to claim that people are not valid.
  • Still don't know anything about the transmedicalists but ban the terfs
  • TERFs have no rights and should go. Transmedicalists are... Kinda difficult? I used to consider myself trans and sorta get where they're coming from. I think it's just a generational issue? I don't think they should be banned outright, like TERFs should, but it should be made very clear that MeIRLGBT isn't the place to discuss that
  • Yeah, but only if you are sure they are terfs/transmed
  • yes, because they're harmful to trans communities and this subreddit should be safe.
Again, a generally anti-terf attitude, which is expected from previous questions.
Once again, this is mostly to inform my moderation style. I am hesitant to ban people because I don’t want to be seen as a powertripping mod out to get everybody. These results, alongside the other terf/transmed ones, are kind of encouraging me to take a slightly heavier hand than I currently am. Again, some specific responses at the end!

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE MORE OF? 98/467

This was complete free-entry, so I’ve gone in and grouped a bunch of the responses together.
  • Ace content: 3
  • Bi content: 4
  • Less bigots
  • Positivity/wholesome shit: 4
  • Trans content: 5
  • Commie shit: 2
  • Garlic bread: 2
  • That Gay Shit: 13
  • OC
  • More activity in general: 5
  • POC content
  • Memes: 25
  • NB content
  • Questioning content
  • Women
  • Intersex content
  • Surveys: 2
  • allowing different titles
  • mod posts for awareness days (ie bisexuality awareness, TDOR, etc)
  • more response to reports
  • peace, love, and understanding
  • a monthly challenge to make themed memes
  • clarity as to what this neat little subreddit is about
  • support threads/posts
Other responses were generally just “nothin, we good”, so that makes up the rest of the responses.
Further answers at the end!

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE LESS OF? 75/467

  • ”Hello gays”. Not everybody in /me_irlgbt is gay.
  • [i removed these comments for being transphobic lol]: 2
  • trolls/bigots: 21
  • That Het Shit: 3
  • That Gay Shit
  • surveys
  • reposts: 6
  • text posts
  • non-meme content: 6
  • baby yoda
  • Capitalism.
  • Christmas decorations in October
  • Contrapoints memes
  • self-deprecating humour: 2
  • equating tops/bottoms to personality or body types. this isn't yoai it's real life, and i know this is more of an overall issue with the gay community but it's pretty prevalent on this sub
  • MYSELF
  • i hope the rest of your day is the best of your day.
Okay to the people who said they want less of themselves and less gay shit you are in the wholeass wrong place are you okay
Reposts seem to be a common issue. Could you lot do me a favour and post in the comments what you think are common reposts? I come on and browse the sub but I really rely on things you report to me, so I don’t always see common reposts.
As far as specific content you don’t like, I’m afraid that’s gonna be a self-directed thing for yall. Downvote the non-rulebreaking content you don’t like and hopefully people will get the message!
Lol @ the one person who said less surveys. Ur in one. Cant stop wont stop x

ANYTHING ELSE TO ADD?

ily, thank you, etc
This shit sweet as hell thank you for taking the time to add it in at the end ily
“all my answers need the addendum of “I am an idiot, and there are many things I don’t know”
Gurl same
Hi
Hi. how u doin
I am a gay
Absolutely. We love that for you.
[bee movie script]
Hi. no. dislike.
Comrades! You have nothing to lose but your chains!
There’s like 5 of you that said this and i love it
imagine being sega and not working towards creating and publishing a new jet set radio future game; absolutely criminal
Imagine being sega. Can’t relate
Perhaps a link in the side bar we can click to escape the subreddit, especially on mobile if possible.
Honestly not a bad idea. I’ll look into this.
Please just add the QA to the name. It’s 2 letters
I’m sorry, i can’t change the subreddit name. I’ll add it to the sidebar tho <3
Sexual attraction is bourgeois
Idk what this means but it is now one of the central tenets of my faith
Thanks for all the “other” options
You’re welcome it made like, 100x more work for me, but i kinda like that we have a smidge of qualitative data alongside all the quantitative shit.
Thanks for letting me participate despite my non LGBT status
Thanks for being chill!
You people need to calm down. I can sense that this energy primarily comes from North America, so I will explain. The level of discrimination and the lack of basic human rights are so extreme, people cannot stand it anymore even if they are not fully aware of these subconscious vibes, so they need to pull extremely in the other direction to make up for this. And hence you have this kind of subculture that emerges as result. The problem is that, you people are as bad as the other end of the problem because you're as extreme, and it translates into over the top aggression and people so insanely touchy they see an attack in absolutely everything, even if they are not being attacked. Become aware of these energies, and chill.
Gurl are you like okay? Do you need a lie down? Some fruit snacks? Everything okay at home?

ADDRESSING COMMENTS

“I think we need mods who do more than just let people police the sub themselves. We may only need a new mod if the current mods don’t change how they mod. Respond to reports is what I’m saying (I don’t see almost any removed comments ever)”
I’m gonna hold my hands up here, I have generally sucked ass at this. I rely almost completely on you lot reporting things to me, but for the longest time I had a big ol mod queue that was just overwhelming to look at. I’ve made changes to this in the past few weeks, including
*expanding automod scripts. Automod now deletes certain slurs automatically, as well as any comment that might be mentioning or encouraging suicide. This is a big help because obviously trolls will rely on their old faithful slurs. I was hesitant to do this because I think we all have a right to slur reclamation, but I think the benefits outweigh that right now. *I got a fancy new mod plugin! It’s called toolbox, and basically just tells me whenever a new post is made so I can approve it or not, and it tells me when I have new reports. It’s made the whole experience less stressful *I spent a day addressing all the shit in the queue. The subreddit used to be like, full anarchy, so there were reports going back 2 years. Again, I take responsibility for that. I’ve been a shitty mod and I am addressing that.
I hope these changes help address those concerns.
” i think a little more mod participation would be cool. just seeing admins in comments laughing and joking along with us, and sharing in the memes”
I’ve honestly been thinking about this comment for a while. I try to avoid posting here because, again, I’ve seen a lot of criticism of mods who participate too much in their own subs, especially when they distinguish their posts. I don’t wanna look like a dick, yknow? But I like this comment and I’m gonna try and just hang out with you lot more <3
Mod posts for awareness days (ie bisexuality awareness, TDOR, etc)
I kinda think this idea slaps. Does anybody have a calendar of important LGBT dates? I think we could tie this into the other comment about challenges for themed memes, where appropriate.
Clarity as to what this neat little subreddit is about
Me_irlgbt is a queer shitposting subreddit. It’s generally for memes and queer fuckery. Not selfies. That’s about it.
Support threads/posts
Okay, so, the reason I’m not going to do this is because I feel that if I post a thread for support, I then have a duty of care to anybody who posts in it. I do not have the capability, time, or knowledge to provide that duty of care, so I feel it would be strongly unethical to do this, regardless of how good the intentions are. I think it’s a well-meaning idea, I just wanted to clarify why I’m personally not comfortable with it.
Not everybody in me_irlgbt is gay. Can we have more inclusivity?
When I use “gay” on this subreddit, especially if I’m referring to the general mass of users, I wholeheartedly mean it in a community way. Like, “we, the gays” as contrapoints once said. You are welcome here. This isn’t the only response along these lines, so I will keep it in mind when making changes.
And we’re done! Holy shit that was a long post. This has taken me 6 days to edit. Again, reiterating from the top, I’m not an adept researchedata analyst, so I’m sure many people could’ve done a MUCH better job looking at these results, but I think this will do for now.
Thank you so much to everybody who responded. It’s been really interesting for me to have a look at this, and pretty cool to get to fuck around with all this data. Thank you ilysm <3

TL;DR

  • The population on this subreddit trends young, mostly 18-24
  • Most people live in the US
  • Most people are white
  • We have slightly more male-identified people than female, but not significantly so.
  • Roughly a quarter of respondents are trans-identified.
  • Most people use she/her or he/him pronouns. Around 18% use they/them, with the rest “other” or neopronouns.
  • About 60% of the people here identify as bisexual or pansexual, 17% lesbian, 16% gay, 17% asexual. These responses do overlap with many people using multiple labels for themselves.
  • mostly high school or college educated, which makes sense with the age demographics
  • overwhelmingly left-leaning politically
  • generally positive feelings towards the subreddit/mods
  • mostly atheist/agnostic religious views
  • 74% of respondents are single/not in a relationship.
  • 88% of respondents do not like TERFs
  • about half of respondents do not like transmedicalists, but 28% are neutral
  • 60% of respondents think we maybe need more mods
  • other responses just need to be read lol
submitted by lowkeyterrible to me_irlgbt

PHP......as a unified cross-platform utility scripting language

EDIT: Based upon the feedback, I would like to clarify that I am not promoting PHP as the one and only cross-platform scripting language. Python, Ruby, NodeJS+Electron, Perl, and many other languages are used for creating high-quality professional cross-platform apps. The purpose of this article is to shed light on how a language that no one would ever think to write a cross-platform application in is actually on-par with the more popular languages.
I know you are likely laughing because the prospect that a scripting language embedded in served web pages could be used to create functional system utilities and applications sounds completely absurd, so hear me out:
  • You can easily write the same code for Linux, Windows, and BSD so long as you don't use any platform-dependent POSIX API.
  • For the GUI, use the script in the post below (see "Secure GUI Via Web Browser In PHP"), which internally executes php -S localhost:12345 after many many security checks, precautions, and hardenings. This will allow one to execute HTML files and JavaScript POSTing to PHP files for interactive content and such. I know this was meant for debugging, but really it can do a lot more. It offers a GUI that is 100% cross-platform with zero modification.
  • PHP has portable binaries for Windows that you can ship with your application
  • PHP can easily load an ini file to configure everything to ensure your application executes the exact way you intended it to. Your PHP-based software would include its own personal php.ini file to ensure that PHP works right for the project.
  • PHP is available pretty much everywhere. Linux, BSD, Solaris, Windows, MacOS, heck even Haiku.
  • PHP is concise and intuitive. I have found myself writing far fewer lines of code in PHP and being much more confident about error-handling than any other language. The reason why PHP has a bad reputation is not that its a bad language, its because people try to copy and paste and shove-together snippets from StackOverflow to make a server with PHP, which is always a 100% bad idea. SO is good, but exclusively copying snippets you don't understand from SO is very very bad. It's also about good practices and good habits. Some places tell you to use ==, other places tell you the double-equally is evil and only use ===. Really, both sides are wrong and you should understand the difference between === and == so that you know when to use each. I use === ~99.98% of the time and == ~0.02% because I know their effects and implications and am deliberate about my usage. When I do want to use ==, those two equals signs save me tons of work and avoid introducing possible bugs because I know the exact behavior of what will happen.
  • PHP is easily installable via whatever package manager is installed on the *nix.
  • Very avoidable breaking changes between versions. The reason why many scripts are stuck to older versions of PHP is because they were using old archaic PHP APIs that have been deprecated for quite a while. Further, PHP 7 introduces nothing that can't be done in PHP 5.4 with a little more work. If you use core solid PHP 5.4 APIs (which are abundant and not constricting at all), your PHP code will run in any version of PHP released in the last 8 years. How many scripting languages can say that? NodeJS v0.12 wasn't released until 2015, and it's adding all sorts of new important APIs every year, pushing from call-back hell into Promises. I'll bet that 10 years from now, the call-back APIs will be completely removed. So much for backward-compatible NodeJS code (without a ton of effort put into backward-compatibility, of course). I am not saying that NodeJS+Electron is bad; it has many unique uses that would be difficult/impossible to do in other languages.
  • Absolutely astounding performance for a scripting language. Every time I run a PHP benchmark, I am wowed by the magic going on under the hood. It outperforms every other scripting language hands-down because PHP has most of its functions heavily-optimized in C code.
  • Much lighter than Electron both in file size and system resources. Electron is needed for advanced things like RTC, but most applications don't need these advanced features. For comparison, the proportional set size usage of sleep(999) in PHP7.4 is only 6,888KiB, whereas setTimeout(function(){},999999) in NodeJS12 results in a PSS of 25,691KiB. Practicality-wise, PHP comes with every utility and helper you want, whereas you often want to load convenience libraries in NodeJS. The PSS usage of the npm utility written in NodeJS is 52,104KiB because of all these memory-bloating convenience libraries.
  • Full-toolbox is included by default. It has been extremely rare that I have ever had to install an extension other than CURL onto PHP, and I usually don't even have to install CURL because much of the basic functionality of CURL already comes with PHP out the box. I have almost always found every possible method and convenience feature already packed into the core of PHP.
  • You can bundle tons of PHP files and any kind of resource up into a single executable PHAR file. When you need a single self-contained file, PHP is indispensable. Granted, an app image provides much of the same functionality, but app images only work well with compiled languages and not so well with scripting languages. (Scripting languages do work, but it can be a pain to deal with the associated dependencies of the scripting language when moving an app image to a different PC)
  • PHP automagically converts from Unix paths to Windows paths and vice-versa depending upon your platform. PHP DOES NOT UNIFY UNIX AND LINUX PATHS! It just swaps forward slashes with backslashes on Windows and vice-versa on Unix, so you can do //sharedfoldername/path/to/file in PHP on Windows to access a shared folder.
  • PHP has amazing operator integration with objects, just the way you would hope things would happen but never do in other languages: array(1,2,3) === array(1,2,3) is true because even though each array is at a different location in memory, comparisons in PHP compare the contents of the arrays instead of the actual values. This greatly cuts down on the amount of code one needs to write.
  • PHP has excellent error handling that enables much PHP code to survive mistakes that would otherwise kill the whole program in other languages because it does what you would hope it would do: array()[10][20] emits a warning to tell you you should do something but still yields NULL anyway because that's what it should do. Instead of emitting a null pointer exception or segmentation fault error, PHP continues on its merry little way just like you would hope.THE PROBLEM with PHP's error handling is that PHP makes it too easy to forget about it. People write code that depends upon PHP's wonky error handling, and this causes these problems to escalate until you reaching a point in your coding where nothing works as you want it to. The problem is not PHP's error handling, rather it's people who think "it works, so let's not touch it." Those people are the real problem, not PHP.
  • PHP itself is very secure and thoroughly tested to eliminate potential security vulnerabilities in the underlying engine. This is not to say that all PHP code is secure because it isn't, rather this is to say that PHP functions do not have strange unedge cases which could result in undefined behavior and escalation of privileges or buffer execution attacks.
  • PHP has separate operators for string concatenation and addition. This is a huge plus because PHP is loosely typed, so having a separate operator for string concatenation tells PHP it needs to convert both operands to a string, which cuts down on validation code and reduces the potential for bugs.
  • PHP now comes pre-installed on Macs. There's no need for the user to have to open the terminal to install brew. This is because a decent portion of people who use Macs are rather computer illiterate and would recoil at the notion of opening this evil hacker black magic thingamajigger called a "terminal."
  • User-defined variables are separated from built-in methods via a prefixed dollar sign so that future versions of PHP do not implement a function with the same name. This issue is not totally fixed of course because you can still use define and write functions without the dollar sign, however, I would say the dollar sign makes code easier to read and mitigates this forwards-compatibility issue.
  • PHP's policy on strings is laissez faire, which is to say that PHP views strings as an array of bytes with helper functions layered on top. This is advantageous over, say Java and Javascript, which both manipulate strings as if they were UCS-2 but displays them in the GUI/console as if they were UTF-16 (WTF, right?). To further complicate matters, Base64 in JavaScript works by treating the UCS-2 string as a Windows 1250 string and throwing an error on characters larger than 255 whereas URI encoding works by translating the UCS-2 into UTF-8 by viewing it as UTF-16 before viewing the UTF-8 as Windows 1250 and escaping the non-URL-safe characters, whereas XMLHttpRequest's responseText and fetch with .text() both work by autodetecting the downloaded document's encoding and converting it to UTF-16 in UCS-2 (WTF, right?). It is a necessary evil for PHP to have Windows 1250 strings in order to avoid the headaches of other languages like JavaScript because, when working with binary data, JavaScript cannot guarantee that none of the characters in the string won't be above 255, whereas PHP does guarantee. This greatly reduces bugs and proactively solves many headaches. I am not saying that how PHP handles strings is all good. It is not good for human text because it messes with multibyte characters. See the cons section below.
  • Controversially, the @ operator can be used for lots of good. The problem is that it is too often misused to handle errors that should be dealt with more aptly. I use the @ operator almost exclusively for IO and other interactions with the outside world where I already have a mechanism for dealing with error, I already have the code prepared for the function not working, and I just don't want to see a useless warning message that I can't do anything to fix. Basically, developers should not view @ as telling PHP to "shut up." A better way to look at it is that @ tells PHP "it's OKAY. I am already handling failure cases and don't need any diagnostics about them."
For some people, PHP is the bane of their existence. It would be the bane of my existence too if I had to pick up the PHP project of someone who wrote bad PHP code. However, dealing only with good PHP code, I view writing PHP as a delightful treat to work with.
CONS OF USING PHP:
  • Durability-wise, there is only one con I can think of: there's no standardized location for the PHP binary on all Unixes like there is with Bash having #!/usbin/env sh, but that's true of most scripting languages.
  • PHP is too easy to start using, and thus many people use it incorrectly and write bad bug-ridden code because they don't know how to write good code due to lack of experience.
  • Performance-wise, well-written C++ and Java can beat well-written PHP hands-down. PHP8 may get on-par with well-written Java with JIT, but it will never outperform hand-optimized C++ code.
  • You can load platform-dependent extensions that need to be compiled per-platform, but this is true with just about every coding language in existence.
  • PHP does not unify the crazy windows drive letter and shared network folder scheme with the utopian Unix methodology of one root folder, and I doubt any language ever will. HOWEVER, PHP does work well with UNC paths on Windows, and not all programs on Windows work well with UNC paths, so that's a plus.
  • PHP has CoW by default for objects passed to functions and scoping must be done explicitly, which (in this dev's mind) both really stink.
  • PHP is loosely typed and does not do a look-ahead validation that all named functions actually exist. A small typo in one of the standard PHP functions could cause the PHP code to unexpectedly crash.
  • It is too easy to make the GUI insecure. Without proper authentication, any other application could connect to the socket, and feed malicious data into the socket as if it were from the webpage. This assumes the malware is already in your system or has a tunnel to your system because an external attacker cannot access applications bound to 127.0.0.1 from outside the computer.
  • Some of the PHP API is inconsistent, and this leads to some confusion when writing code.
  • PHP is a bit weak/lacking when it comes to certain utilities lacking a multibyte counterpart.
  • PHP is not cross-platform when it comes to larger >2GB files. Big files only work out of the box with 64bit integers on 64bit *nixes: Linux: BSD, and MacOS. PHP in 32-bit PCs and Windows takes the lower thirty-two bits of the file size. Ideally, PHP would use floating-point doubles on 32-bit platforms to represent these larger file sizes, but sadly it does not.
  • PHP does not distinguish between binary strings and multibyte strings. Ideally, multibyte characters should by a separate type of variable (multibyte instead of string, perhaps) that is manipulated like an array of 24-bit integers instead of as a string. Multibytes would use a # for literals, concatenation, and conversion: #"Example string\n" is a literal and $mbstr # #"str" appends the text str onto the variable mbstr, but can be shorted to $mbstr # "str" because the binary string "str" is automatically converted to multibyte as if it were UTF-8 encoded. Ideally, all string functions would also accept multibytes and behave the same with multibytes as they do with strings with the exception being that the atomic unit of multibyte strings is 24bits. However, this is sadly not the case in PHP (yet).
  • Backslashes are actually valid characters in a Unix pathname in certain file systems, albiet improper and frowned-upon. The only truly restricted characters are the null character and forwards slash on some file systems. This can conflict with PHP auto-transforming to and fro between backslash and forwards slash depending upon the platform. This really only poses a problem on Unix systems, where malicious code might create a file name in a permissive parent directory, then direct PHP to read a folder with backslashes in the name to coerce PHP down another folder in the same directory towards revealing the contents of a secret file. Not really sure about the practicality or usage of this exploit. Just throwing it out there.
I would say the biggest CON of PHP is that it's not really the beginner language it's advertised to be. It's used to build very powerful servers that need to be very secure to prevent very bad things from happening. This is not an appropriate task for a beginner to coding. Controversially, I would say that PHP is an excellent precision tool for advanced power-users.
Auto-PHP-detection And Dependency Installer
Call me crazy/insane/whatever, but my favorite software is software that just works. I do use my daily driver as a toy when I want to play with it, but when I stop playing with it, I want my daily driver to stop playing with me. I don't want to have to try to open LibreOffice, only to discover that a recent update to one of its dependent libraries has caused LibreOffice to no longer function until I sort out the dependencies because I have work to do and work that needs to get done.
I present you.....the PHP auto-detector and auto-installer script. It is supposed to work in any shell except older versions of Solaris because they have their own backwards funky shell language going on that I don't want to deal with.
Example of an integrated CLI utility using PHP script. Notice how this is actually a shell script that searches for PHP and uses it to execute the rest of the file. This script will only work on Unix systems, not on windows.
#!/usbin/sh searchPathForPhp() { ( IFS=: for p in $PATH; do phppath="$(command -v "$p"/php[0-9]*)" 2>/dev/null if test "0$?" -eq 0; then echo "$phppath" | tail -n1; return 0; fi done ) return 1; } zenitylogin() { prompter="$1"; shift 1 if test -z "$username" -eq 0; then msg='Please enter username and password so that PHP can be installed so things can continue to work smoothly' logininfo="$("$prompter" --forms --text="$msg" --add-entry='Username' --add-password='Password' --separator=' ')" # If the user clicked "cancel" or a Zenity error, then don't even try: if test "0$?" -ne 0; then exit 1; fi username="$(printf '%s' "$logininfo" | head -n1)" password="$(printf '%s' "$logininfo" | tail -n1)" fi printf "%s\n" "$password" | sudo -S -u "$username" -- "[email protected]" } run-su-cmd() { sucmd="$1"; program="$2"; shift 2 "$sucmd" -c "'""$program""'"' "[email protected]"' - "$USER" -- "$0" "[email protected]" } phppath="$(command -v php)" 2>/dev/null if test "0$?" -ne 0; then # calling searchPathForPhp will set the status code to 1 if not available phppath="$(searchPathForPhp)" fi if test "0$?" -ne 0; then # Prompt the user about installing packages and confirm confmsg="$(pwd) needs to install PHP in order to work. Are you OKAY with this script installing PHP automatically?" if test -x "$(command -v xmessage)" 2>/dev/null; then test "$(xmessage -buttons Yes,No -default No -print "$confmsg")" = "No" else # Prompt the user about installing packages test "$(osascript -e 'display dialog "'"$confmsg"'" buttons {"Yes", "No"} default button "No"')" = "No" fi if test "0$?" -ne 0; then exit 1; fi # Exit if we don't have consent e="" if test "$(id -u)" -ne 0; then case "$-" in "*i*") if test -x "$(command -v sudo)" 2>/dev/null; then # Most Linux distros e=sudo else # BSD e="run-su-cmd su" fi ;; *) if test -x "$(command -v pkexec)" 2>/dev/null; then e="pkexec env DISPLAY=$DISPLAY XAUTHORITY=$XAUTHORITY" elif test -x "$(command -v gksudo)" 2>/dev/null; then e=gksudo elif test -x "$(command -v gksu)" 2>/dev/null; then e="run-su-cmd gksu" elif test -x "$(command -v zenity)" 2>/dev/null; then e="zenitylogin zenity" elif test -x "$(command -v yad)" 2>/dev/null; then e="zenitylogin yad" fi ;; esac fi if test -x "$(command -v apt)" 2>/dev/null; then $e apt install -y php-cgi && $e apt install -y php72 || $e apt install -y php elif test -x "$(command -v apk)" 2>/dev/null; then $e apk add --no-cache php72 || $e apk add --no-cache php elif test -x "$(command -v apt-get)" 2>/dev/null; then $e apt-get install -y php-cgi && $e apt-get install -y php72 || $e apt-get install -y php elif test -x "$(command -v yum)" 2>/dev/null; then $e yum install php72-cli || yum install php-cli elif test -x "$(command -v pacman)" 2>/dev/null; then $e pacman -S php72 || $e pacman -S php elif test -x "$(command -v brew)" 2>/dev/null; then $e brew install php72 || $e brew install php elif test -x "$(command -v dnf)" 2>/dev/null; then $e dnf install php72-cli || $e dnf install php-cli elif test -x "$(command -v zypper)" 2>/dev/null; then $e zypper install php-cli || $e zypper install php elif test -x "$(command -v pkg)" 2>/dev/null; then $e pkg install php72 elif test -x "$(command -v emerge)" 2>/dev/null; then $e emerge --ask dev-lang/php:7.2 elif test -x "$(command -v pkgman)" 2>/dev/null; then $e pkgman install cmd:install fi phppath="$(sh -c 'command -v php7.2')" 2>/dev/null if test "0$?" -ne 0; then phppath="$(sh -c 'command -v php')" 2>/dev/null if test "0$?" -ne 0; then # failed to install PHP echo "FAILED TO INSTALL PACKAGE: Package manager not found, you have no internet connection, or another error occured. You must manually install PHP (>=5.4)">&2 exit 1 fi fi fi if test -x "$(command -v grep)" 2>/dev/null; then grep -A1073741823 '<''?php' "$0" | php -- "[email protected]" else echo '/PHP_SCRIPT_''STARTS_AFTER_HERE/+1,$p' | ed -s "$0" | php -- "[email protected]" fi exit 0 PHP_SCRIPT_STARTS_AFTER_HERE  You'll probably want to add -c . to the arguments list to use the php.ini in the current directory to ensure completely consistent behavior wherever this script goes or whatever updates happen. Here is the Batch script for Windows:
@php.exe the-php-script.php -- %* 
However, one might want to use a slightly longer VBScript in order to hide the ugly terminal window:
ReDim arr(WScript.Arguments.Count-2) For i = 1 To WScript.Arguments.Count-1 arr(i-1) = """"+WScript.Arguments(i)+"""" Next CreateObject("Wscript.Shell").Run "php.exe the-php-script.php " & Join(arr.ToArray, " "), 0 
The PHP for Windows would be extracted into the same folder as the Batch script to provide php.exe. Then, the contents of the-php-script.php would be the same as in the script for Unix after the PHP_SCRIPT_STARTS_AFTER_HERE marker:
 It's that easy to redeploy your PHP script on Windows.

Secure GUI Via Web Browser In PHP

It's very possible and very easy to have a very secure GUI in PHP, you just have to do it very correctly. The way to establish a secure GUI is to pipe the command to open the browser with a query string UUID that JavaScript sets a cookie into the OSes shell in order to hide the command line from other processes to hide the UUID. It also uses netstat and cross-platform detection of the users browsers to ensure that a malicious program is not trying to pose as the browser. If the malware has already gained root access all bets are off and much hope is lost, so this assumes the malware is running as an ordinary user. Observe.
// open-www-gui.php // See https://pastebin.com/FPvP3SP6 
This should open a PHP local server in the gui-root directory, and the index.php in the gui-root directory needs this JavaScript to hide the UUID.
 
All PHP files in the gui-root need this AT THE VERY TOP for validation:
6)); unset( $usedHashAlgo ); } else { if (defined('CRYPT_BLOWFISH') && CRYPT_BLOWFISH == 1) { $gotHash = crypt( base64_encode($inPrivKey), get_cfg_var("custom_public_gui_param") ); } else { // else, try to make the best with what little we have got: $gotHash = hash("sha256", $input, FALSE); } } // hash_equals would be superfluous because we are timing for consistancy if ($gotHash !== get_cfg_var("custom_public_gui_hash")) { @usleep( (@random_int(20000,60000)?:240000) - (@microtime() - $authStart) ); exit(1); } unset($authStart); unset($inPrivKey); unset($gotHash); // clean up 
And, voila!: a secure PHP gui to the browser that cannot be intercepted by any non-root user or external attacker. It's not just a proof of concept, this could actually be reliably used in production too.
We additionally need a execStdIn.vbs on Windows so that the PHP server and web browser can continue running in the background after the initial PHP script executes because Windows does not have nohup and the start command either starts a detached terminal or stays in the invisible window but can't start invisible and detached.
' execStdIn.vbs Dim stdin: Set stdin = WScript.StdIn Dim input: input = Replace(stdin.ReadAll, "^", vbCrLf) Call ExecuteGlobal(input) 
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